http://esl-bits.net/advanced-listening/Media/2012-11-20/Just_Crazy_Enough/index.html
Joshua Walters: On Being Just Crazy Enough
My name is Joshua Walters. I'm a performer.
But as far as being a performer, I'm also diagnosed bipolar. I
reframe that as a positive because the crazier I get onstage, the
more entertaining I become. When I was 16 in San Francisco, I had
my breakthrough manic episode in which I thought I was Jesus
Christ. Maybe you thought that was scary, but actually there's no
amount of drugs you can take that can get you as high as if you
I was sent to a place, a psych ward, and in the psych ward,
everyone is doing their own one-man show. (Laughter) There's no
audience like this to justify their rehearsal time. They're just
practicing. One day they'l get here. Now when I got out, I was
diagnosed and I was given medications by a psychiatrist. "Okay,
Josh, why don't we give you some -- why don't we give you some
Zyprexa. Okay? Mmhmm? At least that's what it says on my pen."
(Laughter) Some of you are in the field, I can see. I can feel your
noise. The first half of high school was the struggle of the manic
episode, and the second half was the overmedications of these
drugs, where I was sleeping through high school. The second half
was just one big nap, pretty much, in class. When I got out I had a
choice. I could either deny my mental illness or embrace my mental
There's a movement going on right now to reframe mental illness as
a positive -- at least the hypomanic edge part of it. Now if you don't
know what hypomania is, it's like an engine that's out of control,
maybe a Ferrari engine, with no breaks. Many of the speakers here,
many of you in the audience, have that creative edge, if you know
what I'm talking about. You're driven to do something that
And there's a book -- John Gartner. John Gartner wrote this book
called "The Hypomanic Edge" in which Christopher Columbus and
Ted Turner and Steve Jobs and al these business minds have this
edge to compete. A different book was written not too long ago in
the mid-90s called "Touched With Fire" by Kay Redfield Jamison in
which it was looked at in a creative sense in which Mozart and
Beethoven and Van Gogh al have this manic depression that they
were suffering with. Some of them committed suicide. So it wasn't
Now recently, there's been development in this field. And there was
an article written in the New York Times, September 2010, that
stated: "Just Manic Enough." Just be manic enough in which
investors who are looking for entrepreneurs that have this kind of
spectrum -- you know what I'm talking about -- not maybe ful
bipolar, but they're in the bipolar spectrum -- where on one side,
maybe you think you're Jesus, and on the other side maybe they
just make you a lot of money. (Laughter) Your cal . Your cal . And
everyone's somewhere in the middle. Everyone's somewhere in the
So maybe, you know, there's no such thing as crazy, and being
diagnosed with a mental illness doesn't mean you're crazy. But
maybe it just means you're more sensitive to what most people
can't see or feel. Maybe no one's real y crazy. Everyone is just a
little bit mad. How much depends on where you fal in the spectrum.
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