At 24 i realized i had a problem with food

At 24 I realized I had a problem with food. I have struggled with an eating disorder, since I was fourteen. I of course felt all my habits with food were normal. To my unhealthy surprise at 24 I came to terms, with binging/compulsive eating ECT. During this time I had become very dependent on anti- depressants. I have always struggled with acne. After several try’s of medications my doctor recommends I go on Sarafem, which is an anti depressant. According to my doctor they were non-habit forming and the increase of my seritonin would help my skin heal faster from the extreme breakouts. To my surprise I found my self-happy and very thin due to these prescriptions. During routine check ups my visits became more about how I was feeling then than the problems with my skin. WOW I was happy –happiness does come in the size of a small pill. Soon panic attacks and isonomic would rule my life then I would soon me introduced to Effexor and Wellbutrin. Then it happened I managed to reach the most satisfying level of detachment from myself. I spent the next two years hooked to the once happy pill, now obsessed with the pill, which deleted all feelings. During this time my food intake increased tremendously. I was now the heaviest I had ever been. When approaching my Doctor with my concern of mood swings and weight gain he politely offers me more pills in a variety of milligrams. For the longest time I felt NOTHING!!!!! Detached from emotions was a comforting for a very long time, until one day I realized how empty I felt as I hid beneath my covers and behind the panty door. I had struggled with my weight has a child. Being teased on the playground only made it worst. The worst thing is that I believed every cruel word that was thrown my way. The fact that my mom drags me through her crash diets (jenny Craig, weight watchers, ect) only ignited the problem that would soon digest my entire life. Looking back on the past, everything seems more clear ….A lot had to due with my mom who had struggled learning how to deal with her food problems. While using me has her supportive team player, along for her ride down dieting lane. I assumed the words said on the playground were true. When your parent agrees to let you go on a diet you assume, I must have a weight problem. As the years went by I soon became addicted to diets. I finally decided to get help when the scary thing is the whole time; I thought I had control of my food intake. I would diet-diet, binge-binge, exercise- exercise, diet-diet, ect. This was my idea of having control I could binge as long as I gained only 5lbs and then able to lose 10 lbs. I played this game too long. All of sudden the binging had control of me. I knew the program was working for me the first time I asked my self Why? Am I about to put this in my body? Dr. Lauren Grant helped me come to the realization that the binging was helping me suppress the emotional turmoil that raged with in me. It felt good to finally have control of myself. Lauren all so helped me understand that is okay to feel true emotions instead of eating to temporary forget the truth. The program was very beneficial. At first I was very skeptical. Especially when I was given information that I was eating to subside the pain, and not because I just had a big appetite. I don’t know were I would be today if I never returned for another visit with Dr. Grant. As time passed with every session the truth became more and clearer of my unhealthy patterns when it came to dealing with my problems. She was not only right about pointing out the truth behind my binging but most of all Dr Grant was very supportive. Her support was comforting and Lauren’s understanding was
genuine since she had traveled down this similar road her self. I was finally not alone!!!!!
My life has changed tremendously because of Hungry Heart. I no longer hid behind the pantry door.
I face my problems head on with open arms to truly feel every emotion that will come along the way.
I do not still have issues with food, but I would be lying if I said a hard day never comes along.
When I am having one of those days that is harder than others. I now have the confidence and
strength to accept the struggle instead of suffocating my self with food.
I no longer go on fade diets. I make sure I eat healthy and of course allow my self to fulfill my sweet
tooth once in awhile. This is the healthiest I have ever been and to my surprise, I have just started
training for a triathlon. I m not very athletic, but I know no matter how long it takes me, I will make
it across the finish line.
Every single one of us is capable of having control of our lives. Most of all we are capable of having
the unattainable we think we will never have or accomplish. The support is in our reach and this is
why I strongly recommend this problem to anyone, absolutely anyone.


Source: http://www.hungryheart.org/images/supportdoc/1174174989_Testimonial_At_24_I_realized_I_had_a_problem_with_food.pdf

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